Wednesday, 26 March 2014

Why I feel it is time to remake the original Star Wars trilogy

I know, sacrilege right? But just hear me out.

A New Hope is now 37 years old. 37! That's older than I am and, although admittedly they have been 'tweaked' over the years, you've got to admit that they now look their age. The original trilogy was released well before the demographic the films are aimed at were born and if they are expected to use the prequels as their introduction to Star Wars, then NO, that is just wrong. My kid tried to watch The Phantom Menace and couldn't sit through it (it was 'boring' and there was 'no Darth Vader'). To be honest Episode I is enough to put many people off watching a Star Wars film ever again.

There is a danger of a generation growing up only interested in the Lego movie versions of the Star Wars stories. I admit, they are amusing, but they are what? 20 minutes, half an hour long? It's like jumping in at a final chapter and spending half your time wondering who the people are and what the relationships are between them, even if you find it well written and amusing.

Look at the recent reboot of Star Trek and remake of True Grit. It can be done (in the right hands).

Imagine the scenes that could be improved from the original. Fight scenes that are not just lightsabers being swung well away from the actors, and the force can be used effectively by Jedi and Sith as they do in The Force Unleashed (which is set before A New Hope). Then think of all the problems with the plot that could be fixed:
  • Stormtroopers don't ignore a door when it is locked.
  • The Empire doesn't ignore an escape pod when there are no life signs.
  • Luke is 'hidden' from Anakin but keeps the same last name...on Anakin's home planet...with Anakin's family.
  • Remove the 'incest'.
  • Fix the fact that nobody recognises the two robots who played the biggest part in the prequels, R2D2 and C-3PO (especially Obi-Wan, who interacted with them constantly).
  • Leia says she remembers her real mother.
  • Obi-Wan says that Yoda trained him.
  • Obi-Wan says Anakin wanted Luke to have his lightsaber. His whole story doesn't make any sense after the prequels.
  • Luke is trained to be a Jedi in the same time it takes the Falcon to get to Cloud City (Bespin). In the prequels we see even 'young Anakin' is considered too old to start training.
  • The abilities and technologies they have in the prequels is greater than what they have in IV-VI (and Clone Wars, Force Unleashed etc for that matter too).
  • Stormtroopers should be identical if they are clones.
  • When Anakin became a ghost, he turned into Hayden Christensen.
  • Han Solo’s states that the Millennium Falcon “...made the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs” is just one line that doesn't make any sense and can be changed.
  • The Death Star had to wait to get around a planet to...blow up a planet.
  • Ewoks win.
...to name but a few.

I still prefer the original trilogy to the prequels (that in places were just awful) but with the various inaccuracies and nonsensical plot contrivances that have been highlighted over the years by numerous satire comedies (see Family Guy for example), I get annoyed at the story in places.

I think it's time for a reboot. A better story, better costumes, better acting and action.

Who knows, they might even make it so Han shot first?

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